Disasters
by mykindofparty
Summary: You've seen a few disasters in your life like when your brother caught the microwave—then the entire kitchen—on fire and when that drug deal behind the Piggly Wiggly went south.


**Based on this prompt from _skillzyo_:** Quinn and The Mack have their first dinner as a couple with Judy Fabray. The thing is, Mack's still worried about telling Judy, so she asks Quinn not to tell her just yet. But Quinn has other plans and throughout the dinner, she tries to get Mack to tell Judy using any means necessary.

* * *

You've seen a few disasters in your life like when your brother caught the microwave—then the entire kitchen—on fire and when that drug deal behind the Piggly Wiggly went south.

Then there's your entire relationship with Quinn, who looks like an angel and acts like Courtney Love. She strung you along for a while until she realized that maybe she wasn't as in love with Rachel Fuckface as she thought.

She also quit the Skanks and refused to talk to you the rest of senior year, even when you joined the Troubletones 'cause you knew how much she liked that Glee Club crap.

Things are better now—you're kind of dating and she comes by the ice cream shop where you work almost every day. Then again she tortures you by licking her French Vanilla cone nice and slow while you're stuck behind the counter handing out mint chocolate chip samples to all the little brats.

But right now she is looking at you, expecting an answer to her question.

Do you want to have dinner with her mother? No.

Will you? Probably.

"I think I gotta work that night," you say, trying to get out of this yet at the same time trying not to disappoint her.

"That's too bad. I was hoping to introduce you as my girlfriend," Quinn tells you.

She's just trying to butter you up—the whole G word has loomed in the distance for far too long—but you have to admit that Judy Fabray scares the ever-living crap out of you.

She has that whole Stepford Wife thing going on with her perfect hair that ain't never been mussed up by no bikers in the back room of Harley Joe's. Plus she has all her teeth.

"You don't have to," you mumble. "Really, babe, I'd rather you didn't."

Oh yeah, it's definitely Judy's perfection that intimidates you. The minute you step into Quinn's house for dinner Judy's there, thanking you for bringing your mom's famous tuna casserole.

"Oh, it's nothing," you say. You can't help but feel just as bashful around Judy as you do Quinn sometimes, albeit for entirely different reasons. "Mama made too much for my aunt's wake a while back so we've been eating this stuff for ages."

Judy's smile falters a little, but she doesn't toss the dish in the garbage like you thought she might. You really didn't want to bring the casserole, but your mom insisted.

"Even them snooty patooties on Dudley Road should taste my tuna surprise once in their lives," your mom had said.

"It looks delicious, dear," Judy tells you, and behind her Quinn nods.

"Anything for my…best friend's mom," you say.

Quinn gives you an eat shit and die look, but you just squirm in your seat at the dining room table. She knows how uncomfortable you get around Judy other than that initial time you totally hit on her.

Quinn smacked you for that. Oddly enough, Judy enjoyed how you commented on her smokin' hot bod.

Now you're trapped in the most formal room in the most formal house of the most formal person you know sipping on lemonade and trying to pretend that you don't rip Quinn's clothes off almost every time you spend the night here.

"So Mom, I think Mack has something she wants to tell you," Quinn prompts once Judy's served everyone dinner—including the tuna surprise.

You choke on your food for a split second and realize what Quinn's doing. She's not going to tell her mom you're dating. You're going to have to do it.

Which is total bullshit in your opinion 'cause it's not like your asking for Quinn's hand in marriage or something like that. You just want to take her to the movies and Breadstix and maybe Scandals.

"I'm trying to save up some money so I can visit Quinn when she goes to Yale," you say.

Judy's smile gets a lot less toothy and a lot more real. "That's very sweet, Mackenzie."

Somehow Judy got it into her head that Mackenzie is your real name and even though it's not you pretend it is for her sake. She'd be so disappointed in you if she ever found out the real meaning behind your nickname.

"Yeah, she's such a good _friend_," Quinn says, drawing out the last word carefully like poison from a snakebite.

"Speaking of friends, how are Brittany and Santana?" Judy asks Quinn.

"They're so in love it's disgusting," says Quinn, glaring at you.

You shrug. Those Nutjobs are the biggest lovesick fools you've ever met besides yourself. "They, uh, came by the ice cream shop yesterday."

"Oh?" Judy asks.

They came by to tease you about being Quinn's ball and chain. You told them to buy waffle cones or shut the hell up.

"That's funny because Santana also came by the library where I was reading with Rocky Road dripping from her hair and told me that you're a real jerk," Quinn says.

"I'm the jerk?" you say, your voice growing louder. "You're the one who made me come to this stupid dinner with your mom in the first place!"

Judy looks on as the two of you square off against each other, wisely keeping her mouth shut.

"I don't understand why you refuse to tell her," Quinn shouts at you across the table.

You stand up abruptly, sending Judy's antique dining chair crashing to the floor. "Because!"

But Quinn's too stubborn to let it—or you—go. "Because why?"

You blush. "Because we…fuck under her roof?"

That's when a not-so-surprised Judy decides to step in. "Honey, there's no need to be embarrassed," she tells you. "It's not any worse than the way I found out Quinn was pregnant."

"How'd you find out about that?" you ask.

"Finn sang a song."

You bite your lip. "That sounds pretty bad."

"As a grandmother, all I can say is that at least Noah is Beth's real father."

Quinn rolls her eyes as the two of you burst into giggles. "Glad you are having a good time," she says.

"You're alright, Judy," you say, smiling when she replies that you ain't all that bad yourself.

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Check out Skillzyo's **Main Drag 'Verse** for more awesome Quack! This story loosely fits into it :)


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